To The Cat
I have seen you a couple of times from my front door while you are on your catwalk. You have seen me as well. Remember once I tried to seduce you even though I saw a tag in your neck. You are indeed very loyal to your master. I admire your resistive powers of seduction. I had no bad intentions for you that day, in fact I liked you.
Last night when I was cooking and serving my self a delicious dinner, I went to the backyard through the back door to get some juicy sour lemons. I found the black rubbish bag has been torn apart. And the rubbish was scattered all over the beautiful yard. You damn stupid cat, that’s it from me. It’s the second time you did this. Last time you did it, I spared you. I did not take any action. I cleaned the yard all by myself. But stupid brainless cat, can’t you see it has been raining cats and dogs for two days. Why the heck you have to do your dinner at my back yard and then leaving all the mess there.
It’s time for you to die. I’ll definitely kill you, and I mean it if you do it next time. But for now to teach you a lesson, I’ll Catnap you. I’ll torture you so that you remember not to do your candle light dinners in my backyard. I’ll make you drunk even stoned if I have to and I am deadly serious. You have called on my devil and now you have to face the consequences of the fury of my evil.
No Mercy!
Your Catnapper.
posted by S. Jabbar at 12:45 PM
7 Comments:
but all cats do that, no? rip the trash bags, poop in the gardens, stink up the garage :( and that's just with the strays :/
I am with you, with all my heart, and all of my nifty mind, and all of the evil plans.
Cat, you're doomed.
There is only one cat that do that around our area. She is trying to be some gangster mob or something. No other cat dares to do such kind of obnoxious acts. She really needs to learn a lesson with hard way.
I am making plans to get that cat in my trap ! Any ideas to catch a cat will also be greatly appreciated.
nicely written!!
Catching the cat, the typical way you see in cartoons sometimes: set a trail of food, the cat/mice follows and kaboom it's trapped in a basket :p
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You cant use **** and "all" in the same context.
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